Discipleship... [under construction]

We had a congregational meeting after church today. There were about 20-25 of us gathered in a circle to discuss the state of the Little Rock Vineyard. Where we are at and where we are going as a local body of believers. There has been a struggle here for the past couple years, which has come to a head as of late, that effective and successful ministries are not reproduced. And when those leaders are called elsewhere, they leave a vacuum, or a void if I may, of where they once stood. After years of riding the emotional roller coaster that is watching rich ministry nurture and disciple people only to experience its vacancy has left those drowning in their affective wake, mourning their loss, and weary to try again.

Ideas were presented at our meeting to kick-start the mentoring process by beginning a small group or "fellowship" group. Both of which I believe fall short of the point of discipleship. Others hinted that they have a passion for doing one outreach or another. There seemed an overall reluctance to step out and own ministry however. Whether it was a fear of failure, committing too much, getting burned out, or even a fear that God may want to accomplish the very thing that He has placed in their heart to do; there was a lot of fear in the room.

As Greg himself said, "I thought today's meeting went very well. It was substantive and constructive... To be honest, I was surprised by the level of optimism I heard and felt today. A very nice surprise. " In light of this, obviously it was a large step forward for our church toward the body that God is calling us to be. The vision that is the Little Rock Vineyard to minister to the people of this city and make an impact.

Here is an observation of mine: there are passionate people not being passionate about the things they are passionate about. They are bottle up and frozen. Perhaps they are scared to come uncorked and feel that they may make a mess with their passionate ideas. Maybe they don't want to rock the boat. Maybe they feel they need permission to go after their dreams. Greg said it well this morning in a quote from a book he read, "God has ideas and the church is the avenue through which He accomplishes those ideas" (Mark's paraphrased version). So go ahead, you have permission.

Another observation: this church is not Pastor Greg's church, or the people's church, it is the body of Christ, driven by the Holy Spirit, a symphony orchestrated by God Himself, living in relationship by grace through faith in Jesus Christ. We should be doing what Jesus is doing, following the Father as Jesus does, listening to the Holy Spirit's leading, and living that out in relationship with one another. Personally, God has been squeezing that out of me for the past couple years. I still feel like I have along way to go. And to be known by my love. That is a high calling. It is completely counter-cultural and selfless. I am always reluctant to give and not take in a relationship. And yet I always feel faithfully rewarded when I actually decide to give a little. In some ways it has gotten easier and in other ways it is still very difficult for me.

Jade and I have offered to help where we can at the church. Me being in the military requires a unique perspective for us this time around. In Boise, I was able to maybe flake out on work here and there to give to the church (and in turn flake out on my family and wife as well). To devote all of my energy to serving the church. I don't have that "luxury" now. Jade and I are forced to work together and to make reproduction a necessity to whatever ministry we do here. If I am deployed for months at a time we all need to know that whatever we have a hand in can continue without hindrance. And when my time in Little Rock is done, the same thing needs to be true. It is an uncomfortable feeling, and yet it is also good for me. I don't want to be like those leaders in the past that were amazing while they were here, but left broken hearts in their wake. That's not the kind of legacy I want to leave behind here in Little Rock, Arkansas. I want to play a part wherever I find myself in what I have really owned as a ministry mission statement (from Tri Robinson): "To develop authentic, mature, reproducible, spirit-filled Christian disciples."